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Wednesday, July 28, 2004

Run For The Hills 

I may be mistaken but I think NASA might have found a Death Star lurking nearby. Check Out the photo below.



Click here for more information.

Tuesday, July 27, 2004

Psychic Or Coincidence? 

As I drove in to work today, I listened to the radio for the first time in weeks. As the DJ was chattering away about some inane rubbish and preparing for his daily 'Battle Of The Sexes Quiz', don't ask, it's rubbish, a tune sprung into my head and I started singing the words to it. Don't ask me where it came from, I don't know, but it was Sugar Sugar by The Archies. When I finished the murdering that song, if it can be called a song, I followed it up with an equally bad rendering of I've Got You Babe by Sonny and Cher.

As I finished singing that and pulled up at some traffic lights about half a mile from work, the DJ finished his stupid quiz/competition and put on a advert for Windows/Double glazing company, the advert which I'd never heard before took the form of a parody of 'Sugar Sugar' as it finished the DJ announced that he was going to play a real classic of a song, yes you've guessed it; it was I've Got You Babe by Sonny And Cher.

Did I have a premonition or am I just away with the fairies?

What's This With Sven? 

The media over the last few days has been full of Sven Goran Ericsson stories, all relating to his adulterous behaviour towards a secretary in the employ of his employers. The authors to a man are all calling for him to resign or for the FA to sack him because of it. What a load of bollocks!

Now don't get me wrong, whilst I do think that Sven obviously has the morals of a Tomcat and, that he has obviously courted jobs elsewhere whilst under contract to the FA, I don't think they are good reasons for such self righteous journalists to be calling for his head. What I say to them is this:

"Look deeply into your inner self and answer honestly the following questions:"

If you should happen to enter into an adulterous affair with a work colleague or anyone else for that matter, would your employer be justified and legally entitled to call for your resignation or sacking?

I think we would all expect the said journalists to answer with a resounding "NO! What I do in my personal time is nobodies business but mine". That would just confirm the double standards that most of their cretinous kind operate under.

If some other newspaper came along and offered you double the salary of what you were been currently paid, would you stay where you are, out of loyalty to your current employer?

Somehow I think not.

The only thing Sven has to answer for is the poor showing of the England football team in Euro 2004, that and his obviously poor use of substitutes and lack of tactical nouce. His weaknesses were clearly shown up during that event, His incompetence in EURO 2004 had nothing to do with his extra curricular daliances.

So please shut up and take your double standards elsewhere.

A Necessary Duty 

Ok, jury service is over, I realise it is a necessary duty of an average citizen to perform this public service when called upon, but is the waste of time and money spent on cases really necessary?

I mean in the two weeks I sat on three cases, I say three, but it was really one and a half. The first case was stopped halfway through as the prosecution failed to prove their case, the judge had no alternative, but to stop the trial and direct the jury to find the defendant 'Not Guilty'. For the second case. We all trooped down to the waiting area for the trial court only to be left outside waiting for 20 minutes, in that period the defendant decided to plead Guilty, so we all returned to the Juror assembly rooms, to sit about for over half a day twiddling our thumbs. The third case actually went the full course and we found the defendant guilty. There were plenty of other trials going on where similar events were unfolding.

Whilst the Juror Bailiff did his best to send people home as soon as he knew they weren't needed, there were still a lot of times when jurors were hanging about bored out of their boxes. Even those on a case were in and out of the courtroom like jack-in-the boxes. We didn't have to be in until 10am for a 10:30am start and were invariably finished by 4:00pm, 4:30pm at the latest. On at least two days we got 2 hours for lunch. I'm sure more goes on behind the scenes but everything seemed to take an interminable age. "I think I want to be a judge when I grow up". The hours seem to be pretty decent. .

The cases you get to hear are nothing like those portrayed in films and TV dramas, though obviously they are very important to those taking part on both sides of the fence. I will say that I was very unimpressed with many of the performances of the barristers that I encountered. In fact I thought I could have done a better job than at least two of them, I had the misfortune to witness, namely the prosecution in the first case and the defence in the last case. Both effectively wasted time and public money on what were essentially pointless exercises, both were old enough to have known better.

Anyway enough about that it was an experience to say the least and I'll be better prepared for the next time, if there is a next time. Blue Witch was right with her advice, if you ever get called up to perform this valuable public service, "Take A Good Book", you might actually get through two.

Tuesday, July 13, 2004

In case You're Wondering.... 

In case you're are wondering why I aren't in jury service today; I got the day off for good behaviour, well actually they had too many jurors. The scheduled interruption of service will return after this post.

For Your Pleasure 

Just in case you missed it the first time around, or numerous other times it's been on TV, then a 30 second synopsis of the film Alien can be reviewed by clicking the link. Be warned the synopsis is acted out by cartoon "wabbits" as Elmer Fudd would say.

At this moment in time 3 other films have been condensed into 30 second cartoons and are also available from the site. They are: The Exorcist, The Shining and Titanic.

Enjoy.

Friday, July 09, 2004

Intermission 

The management are sorry to announce that there will now follow an intermission in service of up to 2 weeks.

Jury Service calls.

Wednesday, July 07, 2004

Mrs C's Response.... 

Sailing? You've got to be joking!

Mrs C started back at work again yesterday and hopefully apart from regular future reviews, plus another X-ray and MRI scan to check that her insides are now clear of any cancer, everything should be back to some semblance of normal. The surgeon did admit on Monday though, that they did remove more of her bowel than they had previously intimated, but still thinks that she should make a full recovery.

Tuesday, July 06, 2004

Back To Work Again! 

Well after yesterday and this mornings jollies, I'm back at work. The jollies were our companies thank you to us for winning the contract and consisted of a trip to Lake Windermere to partake in a three hour Outrun Sailing Sundowner Cruise, on the 32 foot Yacht shown in the picture on the link page. What a fantastic experience it was too. Having never sailed on a Yacht before, the silence of the cruise was amazing. Only the sound of the wind, as we progressed up the lake and the captain shouting instructions for us to us to trim the sails etc., etc., accompanied our journey around the lake. We met the Yacht at Shepherds Chandlers Bowness and sailed to towards Ambleside for a while before we turned back South and headed towards our arranged drop off point, at Lakeside, at the south end of the lake.

Though it was a cruise we did help out with the running of the Yacht, hauling on various ropes when needed and taking turns at the wheel. There was plenty off tacking required as we sailed south into the wind, so it wasn't all champagne and plain sailing. I hadn't realised that there were so many hazards on Lake Windermere, apart from other boats, there were more islands than I ever recall, and rock hazards seemed to be everywhere, but we negotiated our way successfully through them whilst the skipper was busy pouring the champagne, well Cava anyway which is just as good and much better value for money. We landed at Lakeside at around 8pm and walked over to The Boathouse Hotel for drinks and a superb meal. I had Cajun Chicken in sour cream sauce for starters and that was followed by a really good Cumberland sausage with accompanying vegetables plus boiled and chipped potatoes. Christine Chapman the owner was particularly welcoming and I can't praise the food or service highly enough.

After the meal we set off along the dark country lane to walk the last mile to our accommodation base at The Swan Hotel at Newby Bridge. What a wonderful peaceful setting that is in, even if it was somewhat more expensive than I would normally afford. Hey Ho, the company was paying so who's counting? The night was rounded off with a Guinness or two and we all retired to bed around midnight.

We got this morning off to a great start with a hearty full English breakfast which helped settle a few queasy stomachs. That was followed, after checking out, by a brisk walk up Gummers How which sorted out any lingering maladies within the party. The views from the top of Gummers How were breathtaking as can be seen in the picture looking down towards Lakeside below:





On the return journey down from the trig point we saw an adder sunning itself (see picture above), but it got slightly miffed by our presence and slithered off into a hole in the rocks. At that point unfortunately we had to return to work.

I certainly hadn't expected sailing to be so much fun and would seriously consider taking the RYA Level 1 and Level 2 courses run by Outrun Sailing. Now I just need to persuade Mrs C that she really would enjoy sailing, even if she does get seasick at the hint of a boat trip.


Friday, July 02, 2004

My Amazement Never Ceases 

It never ceases to amaze me what some folk will pay for what is basically rubbish.

Take the case of the eBay auction for a lump of Glastonbury mud which fetched a winning bid of £490. Then there's the bio-degradeable plastic kite that sold for £113. Ridiculous.

Now I'll bet Pogo, who attended Glastonbury recently, will be busily scraping the mud off the soles of his shoes.

Which Squirrel? Bang! That Squirrel 

Are you in touch with your inner squirrel? If not then find out your squirrel name using the Squirrel Name Generator. Cute!. Apparently I'm Doctor Bushytail.

Nicked form: The Daily Languine.

Thursday, July 01, 2004

One You Might Not Have Seen Yet 

There are plenty of joke pictures floating around pertaining to David Beckham and his missed penalties, but have you seen the following one relating to Wayne Rooney and his goal celebrations?



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